Ghosts of Girlfriends Past is coming back to haunt me by making me admit I actually spent a few dollars to watch this turd. It’s not like I was expecting much, or anything at all, but it was even worse than the cutsie, beautiful-people romantic comedy I wanted for the evening. I don’t think we went more than 30 seconds without a sex joke or innuendo of some sort, and both Matthew and Michael are just getting too old for these groping roles. Rather than renting this formula movie, might I suggest another Hollywood-type that was a little more fulfilling, Bride Wars or Confessions of a Shopaholic. Enjoy.

We had the pleasure of seeing my sister and her kids this past week and here are some of the latest words out of my adorable 3 year old nephew’s mouth.

“When I grow up, I want to be a car-washer.”
“I want to put ketchup and mustard on Sophia and eat her like a hotdog.”
“Let’s play Sneaky-Goofy.” (referring to Hide-And-Go-Seek)
“You try it – you like it.” (and then when he caught on to our schemes…)
“You try it – you don’t like it.”
…and his absolute favorite, “Bolitas!”

What I really enjoyed about this movie was that the movie didn’t think I was an idiot!
Let me explain, most Hollywood films nowadays must think their audience is incapable to put the pieces together or to see the obvious ending that’s a couple hours away. You see how I just thought my audience wouldn’t understand, I must not think much of you..but that’s not true, it was a joke. And see there, I did it again, I had to tell you when there was a joke.
Now would you people just smarten up and get your crap together.
(PS – How do you think Amy Adams and the one-armed man end up getting together?!)

I met my husband downtown after work and we walked up to a nice little, authentic pizza place. This is where I learned the love Italians have for black olives…sheesh, talk about putting a whole can of olives on my pizza. Let’s just say they’ve grown on me after that meal.
Now, this next part is very hard for me to admit, but I have watched all the Harry Potters in the last month. True love! (that is for Hal, not Harry) So we went to see this latest one on the big IMAX downtown in 3-d. That technology is just crazy, you feel like you’re actually going to get hit by something…and the glasses you get to wear are a cool bonus. The movie itself was fine, not sure why so many gave it bad reviews; it’s the same basic formula as all the ones preceding it (ok, except in this one he doesn’t almost get expelled and get an award instead at the end). But then again, I haven’t read any of the books, and I don’t have a yearning to find out what’s going to happen in the next one. All I wonder is if they’ll all be raging alcoholics and whose baby Hermonie will be carrying?
The only question I have: does the guy sitting next to me with the eye-patch get a discount?

I went to Europe and then got a facelift… that is, I vacationed in London and Paris and when we got back Hal updated the look of my site and all pictures are new from the trip.
I saw all the big sites, yawned in front of most of them, and ate fish n’ chips and pastries galore. I walked EVERYWHERE. I saw amazing views from slightly uncomfortable heights in the London Eye, Tate Modern, Sacré-Cœur, and the Eiffel Tower. I peeked at the changing of the guard through the crowd and got sick of the question, “So where are we eating tonight?” I was polite to the ‘jinglers’ (as we called the African men selling cheap Eiffel Towers) at first and then became very annoyed by them when they multiplied every day at all the big sites. I was very happy with the 4 days of sunshine and glad I came back with a bit of colour on my face. I wrote in my handy journal every night and added up the receipts to stay on budget. I bought beautiful shoes in Paris and lousy souvenirs at the airport. I saw a photoshoot with a skinny girl on a carousel and then a movie set with a Matador. I couldn’t believe the prices to see the inside of some old churches and was happy to just visit 2 free ones. I saw both cities from atop a double-decker bus and got the water views from their rivers. I learned that flying direct and international is the best way to fly and that a shower without a curtain is a horrible experience.
I can’t believe my vacation is over and it’s back to work, but I’m so happy to be home!

I’m not sure if I’m getting soft in my age or if all these movies I’ve been watching lately are actually good, but I sure have been loving all these Hollywood flicks. Even through numerous pee breaks (dad’s issues with age), snack breaks, phone calls, etc. I still was pulled into the suspenseful roller coaster of Valkyrie. Even though we all knew how it would end, I still clenched, cried and managed to get past Tom Cruise as the one-eyed-one-handed-German-treasonist.
I didn’t think I would like this movie either (I’m such a pessimist when it comes to Hollywood, and for good reason), but for what they did in the first minute of the movie, changing text and talking from German to English, I was sold and bought right into the Nazi rule in WWII.

Didn’t they just renew their vows, like last season, in a (free) trip to Hawaii for the whole family? What did you think would happen after humiliating your husband every week on national television? I mean, Jon has no excuse, but common Kate, ease up.
Here’s my theory on reality tv land. Do 2 seasons and then get out. Get your money before becoming too famous and run. That’s what I’d do if they wanted to do a reality tv show about my life as a yawner. (That is if they’d even offer me a second season, let alone a first.)
I digress… I actually can’t wait for the new season of awkwardness to begin. If Jon hadn’t of had this ‘affair’ I wouldn’t be tuning in, but now, pull up the couch and move over Little People, we’re prime time!

Who knew Bride Wars and Marley & Me would be such satisfying movies.
I mean a movie about a dog is not exactly my idea of 2 hours well spent, but it was a cute, non-offensive, real (I mean mom wanted to stay home with the kids, that still happens?!), surprising, tearful, and even though it got a little too touching when Marley eats his last kibble, I couldn’t believe it was so good. So this one gets my seal of approval for the whole family.
The only bad part of Bride Wars were Kates’ bangs. It started with laughs when the rating came up and warned of “rude behavior.” And then the brother being the guy from Prime, I was sold. Another great movie for the fam.
So I guess it’s four thumbs up from the weekend.
Enjoy.

GO TO EUROPE!!
Well, I’ve now officially been affected by the recession, and let me tell you, I didn’t see it coming. The company had to downsize and I was sent to the chopping block. Hey, it’s business and I wish my boss the best and maybe we’ll work again one day. My future now feels a little fuzzy but there are no worries, God provides. The funny thing is that the night before, literally, I said these words to a woman looking for work, “I always hated the job search process.” and now here I am (who says God doesn’t have a sense of humor). So, if anyone has or knows of a great, exciting, paying job for me, let me know.
Now, it’s time to pack, the Queen is waiting for me!

Seeing the moon in the middle of the day, hearing little kids speak any language other than English, those first few days of spring, when it rains and the sun’s out, that I’m finally going to Europe this summer, eating, those first few days of winter, coming home from a trip, a clean house, watching a good movie with plenty of yummy snacks, and plenty of other things.